Deaf and Dumb Rant

I’ve taken some hits to the working musician body for including on my latest CD, Snake Eyes, and on the Blackburn-Beach CD, a Mercy Dee Walton tune entitled “One Room Country Shack” that includes the original lyric:

“I’m going to leave here early in the morning,
I’m about to go out of my mind [repeat]
I’ve got to find some kind of companion,
Even if she’s deaf, dumb, crippled and blind.”

Objections included, but were not limited to, the sexist nature of this lyric–the ‘any port in a storm’ mentality it conveys, and to the use of the unenlightened terms in the last line.

Just because this tune was written in a time that predates the ADA and just because it’s been covered by Mose Allison, Lowell Fulson and about twenty other artists and just because I’ve always paid considerable attention to authenticity when I cover tunes, in no way excuses my inclusion of this lyric when it may be found objectionable by some listeners.

Because I’m a Nineties type of guy and I really try at all times to be as politically correct as possible, I’m taking this opportunity to apologize to all who were offended by my utterance of this verse. Of course, I can’t undo the discs that are already pressed and distributed, but I want you all to know I’ve recast this lyric in a new rhyme I hope conveys the best part of the original message while being more in tune with our sensitive times.

Here’s the replacement verse you’ll hear me sing when next you see me in performance:

“I’m going to leave here early in the morning,
I’m about to become mentally unstable [repeat]
I’ve got to find some kind of companion,
Even if she’s differently-abled.”

Depending on circumstances, I may be told by the politically correct handlers at a given performance that my replacement verse contains vocabulary too erudite for the product of current educational efforts. In this case, I have prepared a simpler verse:

“I’m going to leave here early in the morning,
I’m about to get depressed. [repeat]
I’ve got to find some kind of companion,
Even if she can’t get dressed.”

I’m sure Mercy Dee would understand my changes to his lyrics if he were called upon to perform in today’s more positive world.